June 18, 2022 + Ecclesiates 3:1-8 + Funeral of Leon Stevens + Pr. Michelle Sevig
What time is it?
Thousands of years ago the writer of Ecclesiasties wrote about time in a way that isn’t about an exact moment in time, like (looks at watch…10:52)
They said “For everything there is a season. A time to be born and a time to die.” In an instant - in one short sentence the author has expressed how fragile life is. “There is a time to be born and a time to die.”
“What time is it?
We know that we are creatures of time by the way we set our clocks and watches so that we will know what hour it is. We have schedules and appointments set by dates on a calendar. We know larger amounts of time by measuring the months and years. We also know the seasons of Spring, Summer, Fall and Winter, but perhaps time should be measured in more than hours, or days or years.
Perhaps, instead, our lives should be measured by the relationships we have with others. And that is why we gather here today, to honor and remember the relationship we had with Leon. To say goodbye to this beloved one of God and celebrate and give thanks for the relationship we had with him.
I asked some friend’s of Leon’s here at church to share with me some of their memories or reflections on Leon’s presence in their lives. Nearly everyone mentioned his beautiful smile. I mean, look at him (hold up bulletin) grinning from ear to ear sitting at Costco with me eating a hot dog one day as we shopped together for the church picnic. He loved a party and the yearly picnic was a highlight for him, which is why we decided to have a church picnic in his honor today.
One friend wrote, Leon lives on in my heart with a naughty grin and twinkle in his eye. But his boyish fun side hid a deeper, soulful person totally unlike anyone else I've ever known. Leon was always willing to lend a hand, serve faithfully, and give without restraint. He was a truly caring soul who many times gave me a hand, a compliment, or just a smile that showed his presence and love.
Another friend said, Leon’s smile and the sound of his voice are so genuine, lyrical, and a treasured memory for me. He didn’t command a room he was in, but he offered calm light. It’s a quality that I really enjoyed when we were doing night ministry bus outings together back in the days when Elvina did it too. Leon brought joy in such a generous manner.
“Leon made activities fun,” wrote someone else. “Whether it be painting the church, working in the garden, helping to set up the Easter Vigil or even spending a holiday weekend with me installing curtains and blinds in our home.”
He installed blinds in our home too, and Carol’s and Craigs and Lynn’s and_____. How many people here were gifted with Leon’s expertise in window treatments? Even at church we counted on him for blinds and drapes.
For Leon, church time with the community here was sacred time for connecting with others, dressing in drag, sharing a laugh (usually after he made a sarcastic comment) and oftentimes a little bit of gossip too.
But there were seasons in his life when we at Holy Trinity were not a part of his life. The season of marriage at the young age of 18 to his high school sweetheart. And then the season of his daughter’s birth and youngest years. The season of coming out as a gay man and a marriage ending. Though I’d never met Nancy until today, I knew about you because Leon spoke fondly to me of your presence in his life.
The seasons Leon experienced were many. A time to live it up and explore a new found freedom as a gay man in California and a time to return to Chicago and become more involved in Jessica’s life as a teenager. A time to work as a business owner and creative designer and a time to play-taking road trips with Jessica in his Cadillac Eldorado on the California coast. A time for love and a time for loss.
And then, just a short six years ago, a time once again for marriage. Leon and Kevin met on Criag’s list and after their first date, Leon tld his boss the next morning, “Ya know, I think there is something to this one,” and his boss told him to go for it. They’ve been together ever since, tying the knot officially 6 years ago today, June 18th, 2016. Since then they’ve been by each other’s side continuously. And we’ve witnessed Kevin’s faithfulness to Leon as he would bring him to church each Sunday, driving miles each way, and caring for Leon during this season of illness, suffering and pain.
During this final season, after he and Kevin moved back to Illinois, Leon was growing in his new role as a grandparent…Papa. He’s never been one who loved to be with the babies. He didn’t know what to do with toddlers either. But oh did he love his grandkids, Connor and Leah. He was so proud of Jessica and the mother she had become; and enjoyed the times he and Kevin spent with the grandchildren. Jess told me about a bonding moment he had with Connor one afternoon when he told his Papa that he didn’t really like school, and Leon leaned in and shared a secret with Connor. “Ya know what?” he asked with that twinkle in his eye and smile on his face, “ I never really liked school either.”
The scripture text Leon chose from Ecclesiastes says, “There is time and season for every event under heaven. There is a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to love, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to embrace, a time to be born and a time to die.
I believe, no I know, Leon was ready for this time too. We who love him are not ready for this time of mourning…we’re never ready. Because to lose someone to death never seems to be at the right time; often we are not ready for it at all. But Leon knew there is a time to be born and a time to die. He never denied that it would happen. In fact, he made all of his own plans for this funeral: chose the music, the scriptures, even some of the leaders. He wrote in his funeral plans that he wanted “high mass” with all the bells and whistles. He even told Jessica, “I want my funeral to be big big big! Even if you have to hire people to roll around on the floor and cry on the casket.” Once again keeping the laughter alive, even when speaking about a serious subject.
More than just making plans for a big funeral party though, Leon was ready to be done with the suffering, the pain, the numerous hospital stays and close calls. He was prepared to be in that place with God where there is no more suffering, sorrow or pain. To be with the God who created him in such a fabulous way and loved him unconditionally through all of the mistakes, regrets and trauma.
Listen again to the scripture Leon chose, “For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Leon trusted this promise that no matter what season in life he was in, nothing would be able to separate him from God’s love in Christ Jesus.
What time is it?
It’s time for us to remember–to share stories with one another; enjoy a couple of laughs and shed a few tears.
It’s time for us to give thanks–for the ways he loved us, for his gift of gab and good humor, for that smile that could brighten up a whole room.
It’s time for us to commend him into the everloving arms of Jesus and bring him to his final resting place–the garden here at Holy Trinity that was his pride and joy.